Email from the Edge

Jon Kirkeleit
Wed 9/5/2018, 5:54 PM
Paul Hill

Hey,

Time for another installment of “The Old Fart Bitches About Somethin’”

Today’s topic – “The World Is Full Of Idiots and I Strongly Dislike Most Of Them”

Read an article in the latest issue of MacLife, a periodical devoted to all things Mac and Apple.  Actually, I didn’t finish reading the article.  I stopped after the first sentence.  Which was, “The App Store changed my life.”  Now anybody who says “_________ (fill in the blank) changed my life.” is an idiot and doesn’t deserve to live on this planet with higher beings, such as myself and Maxie.  And, I suspect, you and Adrian.  “Transcendental Meditation changed my life.”  “Becoming a vegan changed my life.”  “Learning needlepoint changed my life.”  Morons!  All of them.  Even the physical transformation that women of a certain age endure, and call “the change of life”, is not a life changing event.  There are two truly life changing events.  Just two.  No more.  That’s It.  All she wrote.  One is the birth of one’s child.  The ways in which a person’s life is changed by this event are almost incalculable.  The other is death.  Which is pretty much the ultimate life changing event.

Next time someone tells you that “________ (fill in the blank) changed his or her life,” advise them to go suck on a exhaust pipe for a half hour or so to really experience a life changing event.

The Rockies are in first place.  Can the end be that far away?

Maxie says “Meow”.

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